I'd miss this so much

I have to say today has got to be one of the lousiest start to the week :(

I was actually looking forward to the end of the day. I was already falling asleep while doing my work in the office. I was so tired. Coffee and coke did not do wonders to me. In fact was kept me awake was when I scalded my tongue drinking the cup of mocha.

Rushed back to school to catch the band's rehearsal at the Triangular Gardens. I finally found 23 near my workplace. Super convenient! :) I was really really excited to hear the band play Beatles and Totoro! But generally things didn't go well as planned with unforeseen circumstances taking place....... Sigh. Why so much changes? I hate how it feels right now. Couldn't things be like how it used to be?

I have so much more to say at the moment, and it hurts just bottling up all these thoughts. If you know, you'd know where to go to after this later.

I stood there helplessly for awhile but I knew I had to walk away. But of course, with a heavy heart. At point of time I knew I was silly to actually stay all the way. I should have known. Changes are the only constant in life but I suppose I wasn't ready for all this? :(

There was so much going on and I couldn't tank it all at once. People that mean so much to me, that have been the reason for me to come to band are now either in the new committee, on SIP or just won't be regularly coming for band anymore. Despite the hardship we had gone through, it had brought us closer and the arguments, bitching, playing around....... :( I really would miss this a lot. I look forward to band just to see these people. And now I'm having second thoughts about what I've set my mind on way before this. Would it be the right decision? But I don't want to.

And this :(

I was already pretty much feeling down and I saw this in my mentions. I could feel my tears and my face heating up. It's really happening. Tassha and Aisyah will be heading to Adelaide in less than a week's time. It seems like we just laughed our asses off a week ago and now they're leaving already? It sucks that we're apart now but being so many many miles apart would suck even more :( Gosh, I'm tearing up just at the thought of sending them at the airport........

And yes, thank you Alvin, Joleen and Hordin for cheering me up just now ♥ ♥ ♥ 

I think I would have bawled my way home on 69 if you hadn't insist that I should go with you guys. Hordin's medical check up stories totally cracked us up!

I would say I did a few things unexpectedly today and did I regret it? I don't know. All I knew was I should and I must and taking that lift was the most torturing thing I had to experience tonight. I was so fucking scared. I didn't dare to look at the window and wtf does it move so fucking slowly. Up or down it was mad scary.

Honestly I feel terrible tonight but does it really matter?